tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-48402534726796692002024-02-02T23:20:43.265+00:00Advertising BollocksDetailing some of the rubbish that advertisers spout.PJHhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11331948749785269728noreply@blogger.comBlogger68125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4840253472679669200.post-3698474958108585352013-01-16T12:58:00.000+00:002013-01-16T12:58:45.877+00:00xkcd - Hand Sanitiser<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="http://xkcd.com/1161/" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Hand Sanitizer" border="0" height="120" src="http://imgs.xkcd.com/comics/hand_sanitizer.png" title="Hipster CDC Reports Flu Epidemic Peaked Years Ago" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
20,000 for those who can't be bothered working it out.PJHhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11331948749785269728noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4840253472679669200.post-65878993745885860932012-10-18T13:53:00.000+01:002012-10-18T13:53:35.870+01:00How do you sleep at night?The eminent <a href="http://www.robertphipps.com/">Robert Phipps</a>, a body language 'expert' has been commissioned to produce some research on peoples' sleeping positions.<br />
<br />
Really!<br />
<br />
Lets hear what Robert has to <a href="http://www.robertphipps.com/table/training/">say for himself</a> first:<br />
<br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
Robert's services have been called upon by some of the world's
largest corporations, his media appearances number well over 100 TV
shows and hundreds if not thousands of comments for newspapers,
magazines and radio stations.<br />
Due to popularity most of these
courses get booked quite early, especially as they are often restricted
to just 25 delegates per course.</blockquote>
Golly!<br />
<br />
Back to the research... From <a href="http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/newstopics/howaboutthat/9617122/What-does-your-sleeping-position-say-about-you.html">The Telegraph</a>:<br />
<br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
The results, <i><b>he claims</b></i>, can identify how stressful your day was, how much you
worry and how much control you have over your life.<br />
<br />
It is said to reveal traits such as stubbornness, bossiness and fanciful
dreaming, as well as how self-critical a person is or whether they feel in
control of life. </blockquote>
<br />
Of course. Naturally. How could it not?<br />
<br />
<div class="fourthPar">
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
According to his research, more than half of British adults sleep in the
“foetal” position, curled up on their side with knees tucked in.
This stance, favoured by worriers, is said to show the sleeper is seeking to
return to their comfort zone after a stressful day. </blockquote>
<br />
Utter bollocks.<br />
<br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
The log position, with a straight body and limbs at the sides, shows a person
is inflexible and rigid in thinking, set in their ways and stubborn. </blockquote>
<br />
More bollocks<br />
<br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
A quarter of people taking part in the study classed themselves as “yearners”,
sleeping with their arms stretched out in front as though they are chasing
their dreams or being chased. </blockquote>
<br />
He got paid to produce this?<br />
<br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
A further 17 per cent of respondents classed themselves as “freefallers”,
sleeping face down with their arms outstretched.
<br />
Often clutching their pillow, they can appearing to be “holding on for dear
life” in what is thought to be the most uncomfortable sleeping position for
adults. </blockquote>
<br />
Enough! Who commissioned this piece of self-promoting bollocks?<br />
<br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
The research, for budget hotel chain Premier Inn, revealed the “log” as the
second most popular position, adopted by nearly three in every ten people. </blockquote>
<br />
Ah - thought so - an advert.</div>
PJHhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11331948749785269728noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4840253472679669200.post-52665826053888621492012-07-18T08:51:00.002+01:002012-07-18T08:51:35.018+01:00CALM - suicidal young menAs reported by the <a href="http://www.google.com/hostednews/ukpress/article/ALeqM5h11YuxlUgzzmX9DQd8Rqo_LUqCLQ?docId=N0225961342442043481A">PA</a>, and <a href="http://www.guardian.co.uk/commentisfree/2012/jul/16/mental-health-political-issue">other</a> <a href="http://topnews.us/content/249480-it-s-hard-men-seek-help-hence-they-commit-suicide">media</a>:<br />
<br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
A quarter of adults in England and Wales have considered suicide, research suggests.<br />
Suicidal
thoughts are most common in those aged 45 to 54, with just over a third
(31%) saying they had contemplated taking their own life, according to
the research [...]<br />
<br />
While men and women are both likely to feel suicidal, more men actually commit suicide, the campaign group said.<br />
Calm chief executive Jane Powell said that 75.5% of the 4,517 people who committed suicide in 2010 were men.<br />
She said that gender should be at the heart of Government's suicide-prevention policy.</blockquote>
<br />
Ah, so more taxpayers' money to be spent on... suicides. For men. (Or rather to reduce them.) Wonder where this money should be being spent?<br />
<br />
And who conducted this research? From the PA article:<br />
<br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
[...]according to the research conducted by the Campaign Against Living Miserably (Calm).</blockquote>
<br />
<a href="http://www.thecalmzone.net/" rel="nofollow">Calm</a> is a fake-charity in the UK, who out of their <a href="http://www.charity-commission.gov.uk/Accounts/Ends21%5C0001110621_ac_20110331_e_c.pdf">£153k income for 2011</a>, £152k (of which £98k was deferred to 2012) came from Primary Care Trusts. Which is the NHS. Which is taxpayers' money.<br />
<br />
They describe themselves as:<br />
<br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
The campaign against living miserably (CALM) was set up to reduce the high suicide rate amongst men under 35, currently <em>the single biggest killer of young men in the UK</em></blockquote>
<br />
In other words: Charity that depends on taxpayers' money demands that more taxpayers' money be spent on primary reason for said charity to exist.<br />
<br />
<br />PJHhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11331948749785269728noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4840253472679669200.post-14758559832027734512012-07-17T10:50:00.001+01:002012-07-18T08:51:50.281+01:00Sun Life - funeralsFrom <a href="http://www.telegraph.co.uk/finance/personalfinance/consumertips/household-bills/9403521/Paupers-funerals-increase-as-Government-rejects-half-of-welfare-applicants.html">The Telegraph</a>, <a href="http://www.carehome.co.uk/news/article.cfm/id/1557506/funeral-payment-scheme-proves-it-has-become-too-expensive-for-poor-people-to-die">carehome.co.uk</a>, <a href="http://www.marketwatch.com/story/is-the-governments-funeral-payment-scheme-fit-for-purpose-2012-07-03-61732128">marketwatch</a>, and other media outlets, we have some 'research' into funeral costs in the UK co-conducted by the University of Bath and another partner:<br />
<br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<ul>
<li>Almost half of 69,000 applications for a Funeral Payment (FP) rejected(2) </li>
<li>So-called "pauper's funerals" (Public Health Funerals) expected to rise as it becomes "too expensive for poor people to die" </li>
<li>Funeral Payment applicants forced into debt by committing to funeral cost of GBP 1,000s prior to finding out if they will receive state support
</li>
</ul>
</blockquote>
Gosh. What a sorry state of affairs. Who helped the University of Bath conduct their research? Another impartial group of people?<br />
<br />
From MarketWatch:<br />
<br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
A new Cost of Dying Special Report into Social Fund Funeral Payments
from <b>Sun Life Direct</b> and the University of Bath reveals that the
Funeral Payment scheme, intended to contribute to the cost of
funerals for the most vulnerable in society, is failing to meet
mounting demand.<br />
<br />
[...]<br />
<br />
Simon Cox, <b>head of life planning at Sun Life Direct</b>, says: "We have
to ask ourselves whether the current infrastructure for end of life
support is fit for purpose. Something must be done, and quickly. </blockquote>
<br />
Ah. Company <a href="http://www.sunlifedirect.co.uk/Funeral-Planning/Funeral-Plans/" rel="nofollow">that sells funeral plans</a> seemingly encourages public, through scare tactics, to buy funeral plans. Or this is possibly a run-up to suggesting that the government use a private company (can you think of one?) to take over the <a href="http://www.direct.gov.uk/en/MoneyTaxAndBenefits/BenefitsTaxCreditsAndOtherSupport/Bereaved/DG_10018660">Funeral Payments</a> system in order to get their hands on tax-payers' money.<br />
<br />
In no way is this an advertisement. Not at all.PJHhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11331948749785269728noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4840253472679669200.post-10421077592567750772012-05-12T18:27:00.000+01:002017-07-17T11:31:48.248+01:00ASA going after the wrong people?<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="http://i851.photobucket.com/albums/ab77/Archbishop-Cranmer/C4M_MPU.gif" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="228" src="//i.imgur.com/hrZaTGw.gif" /></a></div>
<br />
Seems a <a href="http://archbishop-cranmer.blogspot.co.uk/2012/05/advertising-standards-authority.html">few people are in a tizzy</a> over the above advert and have complained to the ASA about it being posted to Bishop Cranmer's blog (linked.)<br />
<br />
Quite why this is seen as homophobic, and not persecution towards a blogger, is <a href="http://www.callingengland.net/2012/05/archbishop-cranmer-asa-persecutes-his.html">beyond</a> a <a href="http://www.annaraccoon.com/politics/archbishop-cranmer-and-the-asa-holes/?utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=feed&utm_campaign=Feed%3A+AnnaRaccoon+%28Anna+Raccoon%29&utm_content=Google+Reader">few</a> <a href="http://www.countingcats.com/?p=12296">people</a>.PJHhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11331948749785269728noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4840253472679669200.post-28223610242927294592012-04-05T16:25:00.000+01:002012-04-08T21:41:49.444+01:00Dry ice and CGI smoke are dangerous!!!!one<iframe allowfullscreen="" frameborder="0" height="270" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/IhuHeI4H00U?fs=1" width="480"></iframe><br />
<br />
The latest in the UK Government's nanny-statism, this time pushing the myth of damaging non-first-hand smoke.<br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<br />
[Dry ice flowing over a sofa]<br />
<br />
[Dry ice flowing over net curtains]<br />
<br />
[Dry ice flowing over some child's bricks on the floor]<br />
<br />
[CGI smoke wafting all over the room with a sleeping child in a baby seat]<br />
<br />
[Closeup of child's feet, then hands, then feet.]<br />
<br />
[Mum smoking by window while stood in the room]<br />
<br />
Over 80% of cigarette smoke is invisible,[1]<br />
<br />
[Mum now outside smoking][2]<br />
<br />
so no matter how <br />
<br />
[Mum back inside the room][2]<br />
<br />
careful you are, they still breathe in the harmful poisons.<br />
<br />
[Room without dry ice and CGI smoke showing the child again.]<br />
<br />
If you could see what's really there, you wouldn't smoke.<br />
<br />
Text invisible to 63818 for a Smokefree Kit.</blockquote>
[1] 80% of *smoke* is invisible? I'm sure it isn't.<br />
<br />
[2] And I thought the continuity editors had it hard during films lasting 120 minutes or more - I can only imagine how hard it must be when you're doing a 30 second advert.<br />
<br />
Quite why the government is persisting in stating that second-hand smoke is apparently, given the rhetoric, <a href="http://harridanic.com/wiki/Passive_Smoking#Second_Hand_Smoke">even more damaging to others</a> than the first-hand smoke is to the smoker, despite there being little to no scientific evidence of said harm, isn't really a mystery.<br />
<br />
We even have the <a href="http://www.tobacco-news.net/children-want-smoke-free-worry-free-lives/">Chief Medical Officer attributing middle ear infections</a> (wot?), lung infections, asthma and 40 cot deaths per year to passive smoking and pushing for a ban on smoking in cars.<br />
<br />
While smoke (or any other particulate matter in the air) may start an asthmatic off, I seriously doubt (nor can find any evidence of) passive smoking caused the asthma to start with. <br />
<br />
Cot deaths, aka <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sudden_infant_death_syndrome">Sudden Infant Death Syndrome</a>, is the name attributed to the death of a baby where the reasons are unknown. If 40 cot deaths were actually caused by passive smoking then they wouldn't be called 'cot deaths.'<br />
<br />
And the money spent on this advert is on top of the <a href="http://harridanic.com/wiki/FoI:Funding_of_plainpacksprotect.co.uk#FOI_1112_394_.5B1.5D">~£.5 million pounds</a> of tax-payers money currently being spent by an off-shoot of the UK government in the South West of England to lobby other parts of the government for <a href="http://harridanic.com/wiki/Plain_packaging">plain packaging</a> while the government is in the middle of a 'consultation' over said packaging.PJHhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11331948749785269728noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4840253472679669200.post-72966551577539452552012-03-07T14:47:00.000+00:002017-07-17T11:35:44.697+01:00Predictor: Pregnancy tests<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="http://i945.photobucket.com/albums/ad298/advertisingbollocks/predictorpreview.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="227" src="//i.imgur.com/DCWzgQO.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<br />
<div style="text-align: center;">
[Couple with the 'father' standing behind an obviously pregnant 'mother' both looking happily surprsied at a pregnancy test] </div>
<br />
<div style="text-align: center;">
</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
[Box of 'Predictor']</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
When you want to be sure.</div>
</blockquote>
<br />
A must-have item to see if you're pregnant, even when if it's painfully obvious that you are - indeed - pregnant.PJHhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11331948749785269728noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4840253472679669200.post-816350237308212822012-02-29T12:16:00.001+00:002017-07-17T11:37:32.064+01:00Some people are Sofa King Stupid.<a href="http://www.sofaking.org.uk/">Sofa King</a> have used the strapline "Our Prices are Sofa King Low" for over nine years:<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://i.imgur.com/mPAxoNj.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="//i.imgur.com/mPAxoNj.png" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
Now it seems we have a new generation of stupid people. 3 people <a href="http://www.asa.org.uk/ASA-action/Adjudications/2012/2/The-Sofa-King-Ltd/SHP_ADJ_168619.aspx">complained to the ASA</a> saying the phrase was<br />
<br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
... offensive and unsuitable for general display.</blockquote>
<br />
As Sofa King pointed out in their defence:<br />
<br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
... they had used the slogan "Where the Prices are Sofa King Low!" as their company strap line since they began trading nine years previously and that it was used on their premises and on their vehicles as well as in their advertising. ...complaints made to Northamptonshire Police in 2004 were not
taken further by the Crown Prosecution Service and that no complaints
had been made direct to them.</blockquote>
<br />
Sadly common sense has failed to prevail at the ASA. In their upheld judgement:<br />
<br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
but considered that [the phrase Sofa King Low] could be interpreted as a derivative of the swear
word "fuck", which consumer research had found to be a word so likely
to offend that it should not be used in ads at all, even when it was
relevant to the name of a product.</blockquote>
<br />
Not sure who are the worse idiots - the three who complained, or the ASA for upholding the complaint.<br />
<br />
<hr />
Update: <a href="http://www.bitterwallet.com/sofa-king-low-ad-gets-banned-as-everyone-reads-it-three-times-to-see-the-swear">BitterWallet</a> suggest that -<br />
<br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
Rumours abound that Sofa King will now relocate to Norwich and now use the strapline of ‘Norfolk ‘n’ good’. </blockquote>
PJHhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11331948749785269728noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4840253472679669200.post-52271524946124750102012-02-28T18:40:00.002+00:002012-02-28T18:49:12.160+00:00NHS - Bowel Cancer<div class="swfplayer">
<span id="ctl00_SPWebPartManager1_g_4fe261a5_9b6b_466a_bdd1_37007c8e2d9c_ctl00_bcJSRenderer">
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<span id="ctl00_SPWebPartManager1_g_4fe261a5_9b6b_466a_bdd1_37007c8e2d9c_ctl00_bcJSRenderer"><object class="BrightcoveExperience" data="http://c.brightcove.com/services/viewer/federated_f9?&width=336&height=217&flashID=bcVideo_ctl00_SPWebPartManager1_g_4fe261a5_9b6b_466a_bdd1_37007c8e2d9c_ctl00&playerID=677838310001&%40videoPlayer=763959368001&isVid=True&isUI=true&wmode=transparent&relatedMetaTags=&videoObjectId=ctl00_SPWebPartManager1_g_4fe261a5_9b6b_466a_bdd1_37007c8e2d9c_ctl00&currentURL=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.nhs.uk%2Fbowelcancer%2FPages%2Fbowel-cancer.aspx&autoStart=&debuggerID=&showNoContentMessage=&startTime=1330451587581" height="217" id="bcVideo_ctl00_SPWebPartManager1_g_4fe261a5_9b6b_466a_bdd1_37007c8e2d9c_ctl00" seamlesstabbing="false" tabindex="-1" title=" - Video" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" width="336"><param name="allowScriptAccess" value="always"/>
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<param name="bgcolor" value="#999999"/>
</object> [<a href="http://www.visit4ads.com/advert/Be-Clear-on-Cancer-NHS/89317">Visit4ads</a>]</span><br />
<br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
White man 1: I don't really know how to put this..<br />
White woman: I'm a bit worried...<br />
Black woman: Something has not been right for weeks...<br />
White man 2: There's always a ... bit of blood...<br />
White man 3: Well it's loose .. really loose...<br />
<br />
Voiceover: Blood in your poo, or going more often with looser poo[1], are possible signs of bowel cancer. If you've had either of these symptoms for three weeks or more, tell your doctor. <br />
<br />
Dr Terry Bowley: It doesn't matter how you tell me, just tell me.<br />
<br />
Voiceover: Finding it early makes it more treatable. Be clear on Cancer.</blockquote>
</div>
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<a href="http://www.nhs.uk/bowelcancer/Pages/bowel-cancer.aspx">More money wasting by the NHS</a>[<a href="http://www.webcitation.org/65nOBt4NS">archive</a>], and they're talking down to you this time. </div>
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Are there really adults that use the infantile word 'poo,' when talking with other adults, when there are a <a href="http://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/shit#Synonyms">wealth of words</a> that could be otherwise used, e.g. fæces, stools, shit, crap?</div>
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<br /></div>
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The last two of which could probably be used as adjectives for this advert.</div>
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<br /></div>
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More seriously, who really needs an advert to tell them to go to the doctor if they've been shitting blood or have had diarrhea for three weeks? </div>
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Most who would go anyway, would go long before the three weeks (with or without this advert,) those not so inclined to bother their doctor with something so minor as blood pouring out their anus is hardly likely to change their mind by watching an advert that patronises them by calling the stuff that comes out of their rectum 'poo.'</div>
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[1] Is this the P.C. phrase for 'the shits' or diarrhea these days? </div>
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</span></div>PJHhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11261864788124419149noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4840253472679669200.post-1896940741100403762012-02-28T14:53:00.001+00:002017-07-17T11:39:43.023+01:00Acupuncture Awareness WeekUpdate March 1: The poll's back up, but with the numbers fiddled - at the time of writing: 32% no, 68% yes, on a total vote count of.... 338. And you have to register to vote.
<br />
<hr />
<br />
<div class="tr_bq">
Update 16:16 GMT: Well that poll didn't last long, did it? At my last count there was 1864(82.9%) No, 348(17.1%) Yes before it 'disappeared.' (Even though the poll is still on their front page.) Strange that.<br />
<br />
<hr />
<br />
It appears that the British Acupuncture Council have decided that 27th February – 4th March 2012 should be Acupuncture Awareness Week.</div>
<br />
As most people should be 'aware,' Acupuncture is <a href="http://askepticrtn.com/?p=504">complete</a> and <a href="http://www.dcscience.net/improbable.html#acu2">utter</a> <a href="http://www.sciencebasedmedicine.org/index.php/acupuncture-infertility-and-horrible-reporting/">bollocks</a>, so it the campaign seems a little pointless.<br />
<br />
Nevertheless, <a href="http://www.introducingacupuncture.co.uk/">they're still trying</a>[<a href="http://www.webcitation.org/65n9JtEL9">archive</a>]:<br />
<br />
<blockquote>
<br />
The first ever Acupuncture Awareness Week in the UK, supported by the British Acupuncture Council, aims to dispel the myths surrounding acupuncture[1], what conditions it can help[2] and give members of the public/you all the information you need about treatment.[3]</blockquote>
[1] No doubt they won't be pointing out the myths they promulgate such as it works, it cures cancer, etc.<br />
[2] None, perhaps?<br />
[3] "It doesn't work"?<br />
<br />
Thought not.<br />
<br />
They even have a poll on whether the tax payer should give more funding to this woo <a href="http://www.introducingacupuncture.co.uk/component/acepolls/poll/1-do-you-think-acupuncture-should-be-made-more-widely-available-on-the-nhs.html">via the NHS</a> [no archive since it won't].<br />
<br />
At the time of posting (since it was pointed out by <a href="http://scienceblogs.com/pharyngula/2012/02/celebrate_acupuncture_awarenes.php?utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=feed&utm_campaign=Feed%3A+scienceblogs%2Fpharyngula+%28Pharyngula%29&utm_content=Google+Reader">Pharyngula</a>) it seems to be going well:<br />
<br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<b>
Do you think acupuncture should be made more widely available on the NHS?</b><br />
No: 61.6%<br />
Yes:38.4%
<br />
<b>Total votes</b>: 787</blockquote>
PJHhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11331948749785269728noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4840253472679669200.post-73322649979344206892012-02-23T19:24:00.000+00:002017-07-17T11:42:38.367+01:00Virgin Money diddling saversFrom <a href="http://www.webcitation.org/65fkW9kHR">here</a> [<a href="http://www.virgin.com/money/news/virgin-money-encourages-the-early-birds">current</a>], Virgin Money are attempting to get those who have money they want to put into an <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Individual_Savings_Account">ISA</a> next tax year (April 6th 2012) to save with them now:<br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<br />
<div style="text-align: center;">
<u>Virgin Money encourages the Early Birds</u></div>
<br />
Virgin Money have continued their mission to make banking better[1], with details of a new ‘Early Bird ISA’[2] being released.<br />
<br />
Those of you who currently have an ISA will be familiar with the limitations of only being able to put a certain amount in the account each year, making planning ahead that little bit more difficult.[3] <br />
<br />
As a keen innovator[4] Virgin Money has sought to bypass this problem by allowing customers to open a savings account now and load next year’s ISA limit into it, with the bank paying the same interest that you’d get in a tax free ISA.[5]<br />
<br />
Once the new tax year begins on April 6th Virgin Money simply drop your savings (and any interest accrued) into your ISA, the Early Bird ISA pays an equivalent rate of the Virgin Money ISA[6] – both of which are tax free.[7]</blockquote>
For those not au-fait with what cash ISA's are, and can't be bothered clicking the wiki link above, all interest on 'normal' cash savings in the UK is taxed at the marginal income tax rate of the person earning that interest. Typically this is 20%[8]. So, if you earn £100 interest on your savings, £20 will be deducted at source.<br />
<br />
ISA's pay their interest gross, i.e. the interest isn't taxed at source, and it doesn't need to be declared to HMRC. The amount you can save per year is limited (£5,340 for 2011/2012) on a 'use it or lose it' basis.<br />
<br />
<br />
[1] Well they can't do much worse than Natwest's '<a href="http://advertisingbollocks.blogspot.com/search/label/helpful%20banking">helpful banking</a>' I suppose...<br />
<br />
[2] I think the ASA might have something to say about the naming of this - it's patently not an ISA.<br />
<br />
[3] Seriously guys, it's a bit patronising to accuse your (potential) customers of being thick/unable to plan if they're actually able to accumulate savings (i.e. plan ahead) to put into the next year's ISA before they 'open.'<br />
<br />
[4] A previous innovation was to offer <i><b>only</b></i> <a href="http://money.aol.co.uk/2012/01/02/virgin-bank-charges-for-current-accounts/">current accounts that charge £60/yr</a>. The next innovation was to <a href="http://www.thisismoney.co.uk/money/saving/article-2085060/Virgin-scraps-60-current-account-fees-takeover-Northern-Rock.html">offer fee-free accounts</a> after they were criticised for their last innovation.<br />
<br />
Another innovation is their <a href="http://www.webcitation.org/65flz57vK">rather expensive tracker</a> fund [<a href="http://uk.virginmoney.com/virgin/unit-trusts/ftse/more-info.jsp">current</a>] that costs 1% per year. Three to four times as much as <a href="https://www.fidelity.co.uk/investor/research-funds/fund-supermarket/factsheet/summary.page?idtype=ISIN&fundid=GB0003875324">cheaper</a> <a href="http://www.assetmanagement.hsbc.com/uk/advisers/funds-in-focus/indextrack_fund.html">funds</a> that do exactly the same thing.<br />
<br />
[5] This is where the bollocks comes in. The whole point of ISAs is to get interest tax free. So in theory, banks should provide savings accounts with the same rate across the board. For example, if BarcWest Bank decides to offer savings accounts at 4%, they'd offer a regular savings account where tax is deducted at source (net of 3.2%), and an ISA savings account where tax isn't deducted ('net' 4%.)<br />
<br />
What Virgin are doing is offering, is the equivalent of a regular savings account at 4%, and ISA savings accounts at 3.2%.<br />
<br />
[6] Despite my illustrative examples above, Virgin are only offering <a href="http://www.webcitation.org/65fnDKZpo">2.85%</a>[<a href="http://uk.virginmoney.com/virgin/cash-isa/">current</a>]. Inflation is currently running at 4.8%. Best instant access ISA I could find at the time of writing elsewhere is <a href="http://www.webcitation.org/65fokKBmg">3.10%</a>[<a href="http://www.nationwide.co.uk/savings/onlineisa/landing-page.asp">current</a>]. Virgin being innovative again it seems, by having a crap rate.<br />
<br />
[7] No, no, <u><i><b>no</b></i></u>! They are <i><u><b>not</b></u></i> both tax free. The 'Early Bird ISA' is not tax free - I'm assuming they've simply upped the taxed account's rate such that the net it pays is the same as it would be if it was in an ISA.<br />
<br />
Presumably this is just for 20%er's - they don't go into detail about the 40/50%er's who have to fill out self-assessments and fork out the other 20% at tax-year-end.<br />
<br />
This is akin to the "we'll pay your VAT" adverts that are seen - VAT is still payable on the (new) sale price - it's simply that the sale price has been reduced to the pre-VAT value on the original price.<br />
<br />
[8] Higher rate tax payers pay 40% or 50% depending on their income, and a small proportion of people only pay 10% if savings interest is their only income up to a certain amount.PJHhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11331948749785269728noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4840253472679669200.post-76849807274607144482012-01-01T02:45:00.001+00:002012-01-01T02:46:00.820+00:00Happy new year.I'd like to wish my reader a Happy New Year, and to let them know that I've not abandoned this blog - merely been too busy else-web (and life) to do detailed posts on here since June (that, and most of the tripe I've seen on TV that, in quieter times, I would have posted about, has been merely repetitions of stuff I've already posted about - usually the 99.9% of germs bollocks.)<br />
<br />
If my reader would like to make suggestions on further posts I could make, they would be gratefully accepted.PJHhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11331948749785269728noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4840253472679669200.post-15720349654087116722011-06-02T16:09:00.000+01:002017-07-17T11:43:40.339+01:00Smoking is no longer a health condition...Via <a href="http://www.asa.org.uk/ASA-action/Adjudications/2011/6/Asda-Financial-Services-Ltd/TF_ADJ_50544.aspx">everyone's favourite toothless advertising regulator</a>:<br />
<br />
<blockquote>
They added that as smoking was not a health condition, being asked if you were a smoker was, therefore, not a health question.<br />
[...]<br />
The ASA noted that Asda had followed the BMA and ABI guidelines in considering smoking to be a lifestyle choice </blockquote>
<br />
The ASA case in question revolves around whether Asda, in advertising life insurance with "no health questions asked" can get away with asking potential clients if they smoke or not.<br />
<br />
Here in the real world, where smokers are regularly discriminated against on the basis of not only their own health (NHS costs,) but others (second hand and the fabled third hand smoke) it's hard to see how "do you smoke" cannot be construed as a health question.<br />
<br />
One does, however, wonder what other "lifestyle choice" questions the nice people at Asda also ask, since the adjudication is strangely quiet.<br />
<br />
<ul>
<li>Have you had <a href="http://www.blood.co.uk/can-i-give-blood/exclusion/">sex with a man, or anyone who's had sex with a man</a>, in the past 60 years?</li>
<li>Have you ever consumed <a href="http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/life_and_style/food_and_drink/article2697975.ece">excess ethanol</a>?</li>
<li>Do you religiously eat your <a href="http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/food/article-1349960/5-day-fruit-vegetables-myth-claims-nutrition-expert.html">five-a-day</a>?</li>
<li>Do you regularly use sun factor 5,000 when <a href="http://www.telegraph.co.uk/health/healthnews/8128781/Middle-class-children-suffering-rickets.html">going outdoors in daylight</a>?</li>
<li>Do you own, or have you ever owned, <a href="http://health.howstuffworks.com/diseases-conditions/cancer/facts/10-cancer-myths7.htm">a mobile phone</a>?</li>
</ul>
<br />
I'm sure the list is, if not endless, quite large.<br />
<br />
Well at least we now know you can tell your doctor to mind his own business when he asks how many you smoke, since it has no bearing on your health whatsoever; it's simply a lifestyle choice.PJHhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11331948749785269728noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4840253472679669200.post-23200419367817334932011-03-22T17:24:00.001+00:002017-07-17T11:47:27.691+01:00(g^2)^7 - how not to be a maths teacher on camera."Turn Your Talent to Teaching"- but make sure they bloody camera-man doesn't catch you writing the wrong answers on the board.<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="//i.imgur.com/XZBEMUy.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="180" src="//i.imgur.com/XZBEMUy.png" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
The UK Government, once again wasting our money, is advertising for teachers. Maths teachers. Just a shame the editors included this bit in the still above.[1] Perhaps those useless maths classes at school weren't so useless. At least if you're in media/advertising.<br />
<br />
The video, while it's still around (the `still' is from around 19s):<br />
<div style="text-align: center;">
<iframe allowfullscreen="" frameborder="0" height="195" src="//www.youtube.com/embed/fggEgAGCXWw" title="YouTube video player" width="320"></iframe> </div>
<blockquote>
<span style="font-size: x-small;"><i>Teacher</i>: What I want you do now is we're[2] going to look at how we're going to solve this equation here.[(g<sup>2</sup>)<sup>7</sup>=g<sup>?</sup> appears on the board as a problem</span><span style="font-size: x-small;">]<br />
<br />
<i>Teacher's voiceover</i>: If it's an early lesson and I need to get them started, [we see the kids playing bingo] I try different ways to clear the cobwebs out. [teacher writes g<sup>2</sup>×g<sup>7</sup> on the board]</span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-small;"> <br />
<i>Teacher</i>: This one, is just do[2] the highest common factor, so what's the highest common factor of 80 and 60. <br />
<br />
<i>Kids</i>: <mumbles of 'twenty'><br />
<br />
<i>Teacher</i>: Do'ya[2] think it's twenty? Twenty, yeah?<br />
<br />
<i>One Kid</i>: Bingo!<br />
<br />
<i>Other kids</i>: <cheers><br />
<br />
Voiceover: Turn your talent to teaching. Visit teach.gov.uk</span></blockquote>
<br />
The <a href="//www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1368791/Boy-spots-government-teacher-advert-WRONG-answer-maths-question.html">Daily Mail</a> appears to have been the first paper out with this 'mistake' being spotted by some 15yr old spotty oik[3] claiming they're showing the wrong answer.<br />
<br />
Of course, that segment could quite probably have lasted a couple of minutes in the classroom there, with the teacher pointing out why it's not the right solution, but to include it in the final advert where it could be misinterpreted? Laziness on the behalf of the advertisers.<br />
<br />
Of course, the DM's on a rant about how this 'wrong' answer shows declining standards in our schools. I'm more put out by the standard of spoken English by the teacher[2].<br />
<br />
<br />
Mr. Coombs is praised highly for his observation of course. From the DM article:<br />
<blockquote>
Adam Williams, principal of John Cabot Academy which Chris attends, praised the schoolboy's attention to detail.</blockquote>
Aren't you simply looking forward him being one of your colleagues a few years hence? No big-headedness of course, just a mention in a newspaper article.<br />
<blockquote>
He said: 'It is great to think that Chris showed that degree of observation and understanding of maths to spot the apparent error in the advert.'</blockquote>
I learnt about indices in the first year of secondary school (12 yrs old) - just when are they teaching them these days? A-levels? <br />
<br />
<br />
<hr />
[1] For those who can't spot it, (g<sup>2</sup>)<sup>7</sup>, is g<sup>2</sup>×g<sup>2</sup>×g<sup>2</sup>×g<sup>2</sup>×g<sup>2</sup>×g<sup>2</sup>×g<sup>2</sup> which is g<sup>14</sup>. Not g<sup>2</sup>×g<sup>7</sup> which is g<sup>9</sup>. And Wrong™<br />
<br />
[2] Probably just as well she's not teaching English.<br />
<br />
[3] Well - Chris Coombs doesn't look <i>too</i> spotty from the DM photo.PJHhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11331948749785269728noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4840253472679669200.post-51252185837538119352011-03-15T23:13:00.001+00:002017-07-17T11:49:12.263+01:00Powerade ION4 - making you wetter than a wet thing in lots of wet stuff.<div style="text-align: center;">
<div style="text-align: left;">
Prompted by STONESTREEKER:<br />
<br />
<hr />
Update: Jan 2014, <a href="https://www.asa.org.uk/Rulings/Adjudications/2014/1/GlaxoSmithKline-UK-Ltd/SHP_ADJ_220538.aspx">ASA found <i>against</i> GlaxoSmithKline UK Ltd</a> when they made a similar claim of "hydrates and fuels you better than water" finding that it "did not appear on the list of authorised health claims in respect of carbohydrate-electrolyte drinks"<br />
<hr />
Update: Jan 2012, <a href="https://www.asa.org.uk/ASA-action/Adjudications/2012/1/Beverage-Services-Ltd/SHP_ADJ_156530.aspx">ASA found in favour of Coca-Cola</a> when two people make complaints about this advertising campain.<br />
<hr />
</div>
<br />
<iframe allowfullscreen="" frameborder="0" height="195" src="//www.youtube.com/embed/9byyGbPCRas" title="YouTube video player" width="320"></iframe></div>
<br />
<blockquote>
New, improved[1], Powerade ION4 [Subs: Na, Ca, Mg, K] [Sub: Contains carbohydrates] replenishes fuel and 4 of the minerals lost in sweat.<br />
<br />
[Sub: Preparation]<br />
<br />
[Sub: Determination]<br />
<br />
[Sub: Perspiration]<br />
<br />
[Sub: Hydration]<br />
<br />
Powerade ION4, hydrates better than water.<br />
<br />
Keep sweating.</blockquote>
<br />
Presenting Coca-Cola's new and improved[1] <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sports_drink">sports drink</a>. They'll be sponsoring the Olympics (2012) dontcha know.<br />
<br />
However it's not exactly new[1]. From the <a href="http://www.webcitation.org/5xDEUXEhC">US website</a>[<a href="http://www.us.powerade.com/what-is-ion4">current</a> - there's a video there that didn't make it to the archive]:<br />
<br />
<blockquote>
In <i><u><b>2009</b></u></i>, POWERADE<sup>®</sup> sports scientists created ION4<sup>®</sup>, which revolutionized the sports drink. ION4<sup>®</sup> is an advanced electrolyte system that is in POWERADE<sup>®</sup> to help replenish four electrolytes lost in sweat.</blockquote>
<br />
I wouldn't call a 2 year old product "new." Certainly not in the context of advertising. So that's a load of bollocks right from the start.<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
Back to the UK advert, they claim to "hydrate better than water." Sounds a tad spurious. Lets look at what it's supposed to 'help' with, or mitigate - dehydration.<br />
<br />
The medical definition of dehydration (or <a href="http://medical-dictionary.thefreedictionary.com/Hypohydration">hypohydration</a>) is:<br />
<br />
<blockquote>
[...] the loss of water and salts <i><u><b>essential for normal body function</b></u></i>.</blockquote>
<br />
There are various stages/severity of dehydration:<br />
<blockquote>
<i><u><b>Mild dehydration is the loss of no more than 5% of the body's fluid.</b></u></i> Loss of 5-10% is considered moderate dehydration. Severe dehydration (loss of 10-15% of body fluids) is a life-threatening condition that requires immediate medical care.</blockquote>
Causes of dehydration?<br />
<blockquote>
<i><u><b>Strenuous activity, excessive sweating</b></u></i>, high fever, and prolonged vomiting or diarrhea</blockquote>
Symptoms?<br />
<blockquote>
Symptoms of dehydration at any age include cracked lips, dry or sticky mouth, lethargy, and sunken eyes. A person who is dehydrated cries without shedding tears and does not urinate very often. The skin is less elastic than it should be and is slow to return to its normal position after being pinched. </blockquote>
Treatment?<br />
<blockquote>
Increased fluid intake and replacement of lost electrolytes are usually sufficient to restore fluid balances in patients who are mildly or moderately dehydrated. <i><u><b>For individuals who are mildly dehydrated, just drinking plain water may be all the treatment that is needed</b></u></i>. Adults who <i><u><b> need</b></u></i> to replace lost electrolytes <u><b>may</b></u> drink sports beverages <i><u><b>or consume a little additional salt</b></u></i>. </blockquote>
<br />
<br />
So. Yes. If you're <i><u><b>MILDLY</b></u></i> dehydrated, Powerade, <i><u><b>MAY</b></u></i> be used to replace some salts lost during heavy sweating during exercise. (If you've lost quite a bit of fluid/your electrolyte balance is way off however I'd suggest you visit a doctor/hospital rather than drink this as a treatement.)<br />
<br />
Or you could just drink water and, possibly, eat a packet of salt and vinegar crisps. Doing both, of course will also "hydrate you better than water (alone.)"<br />
<br />
I think I know which will probably be cheaper. (I can't find any ION4 online at the moment, but from Ocado, <a href="http://www.ocado.com/webshop/product/Powerade-Cherry/53283011?from=search&tags=%7C20000%7C17884%7C13500&param=Powerade&parentContainer=SEARCHPowerade_SHELFVIEW">4x500ml bottles Powerade Cherry</a>: £3.49. 12x25g<a href="http://www.ocado.com/webshop/product/Walkers-Ready-Salted-Crisps/44482011?from=search&tags=%7C20000&param=Ready+Salted+Crisps&parentContainer=SEARCHReady+Salted+Cr_SHELFVIEW"> Walker's Ready Salted</a>: £2.65)<br />
<br />
So while their claim to "hydrate better than water" isn't entirely bollocks, the way they present it - as something wonderful that cannot be achieved by anything else - is. <br />
<br />
On the specific salts/minerals they mention - your body is adaptable. It can get temporarily lower on them without danger and can obtain all sorts of vitamins and minerals and salts from your (hopefully varied) diet. If you get a little low on some of them, your body will catch up. If you're getting dangerously low on some of them then Powerade isn't going to help you.<br />
<br />
I'll probably do a post on the snake-oil that are OTC, self medicated, mineral supplements in general (or some specific ones) sometime.<br />
<br />
<hr />
<br />
[1] Come now. It can't be both. If it's new, then there isn't an old thing to improve upon. If it's improved then there must have been an older thing. Or as one <a href="http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20080308020313AATJiqv">Yahoo Answerer succinctly put it</a>:<br />
<blockquote>
It's improving on the perfectly good thing that you own that the ad agency wants you to now think of as junk, so you'll buy the product they are pitching.</blockquote>
PJHhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11331948749785269728noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4840253472679669200.post-1159131419818958682011-03-06T22:36:00.001+00:002017-07-17T11:51:07.599+01:00"For God's sake" is not offensive.In the ongoing campaign by various groups about the invasive nature of, and pointlessness that is the UK Census being held this year, one group - the <a href="http://www.humanism.org.uk/">British Humanist Association</a>[1] came up with three posters addressing what is <a href="http://2011.census.gov.uk/My-census/Frequently-asked-questions#17">the only voluntary question on the whole census</a> - the religion question. One is shown below; all three can be seen <a href="http://www.humanism.org.uk/campaigns/census-2011/census-adverts">here</a>.<br />
<blockquote>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://i.imgur.com/38olwOD.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="//i.imgur.com/38olwOD.jpg" width="213" /></a></div>
Not Religious?</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
In the 2011 Census Tick "No Religion"</div>
<br />
"I put 'Jedi' in the last census. But I'll tick 'No religion this time.<br />
<br />
I'm not religious and I don't want Bishops and the government saying this is a religious country.<br />
<br />
That's just an excuse to keep religion in politics."<br />
<br />
<div style="text-align: center;">
If you're not religious for God's sake say so.</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
cencus-campaign.org.uk</div>
</blockquote>
<br />
<br />
The intention was to buy advertising space at railway stations to display the posters<br />
<br />
<a href="http://www.cbsoutdoor.co.uk/">CBS Outdoor</a>, the advertisers that <a href="http://freethinker.co.uk/2011/03/06/atheists-must-stand-up-and-be-counted/">own the space</a>, <a href="http://www.humanism.org.uk/news/view/758">had other ideas</a>.<br />
<br />
<blockquote>
Two reasons were given by owners of the space: they were concerned that the use of the phrase ‘for God’s sake’ would cause widespread and serious offence and they also did not wish to take adverts relating to religion.</blockquote>
<br />
As the BHA allude to, only the professionally offended could take "widespread and serious offence,"<br />
<br />
But what the BHA didn't point out (at least in their PR) is that the <a href="http://www.newstatesman.com/blogs/helen-lewis-hasteley/2011/03/census-british-god-adverts">second reason is also spurious</a>. Lots of religious groups are quite capable, and able, to advertise on the self-same spots. Those listed (though probably not exhaustive) include the <a href="http://uk.alpha.org/">Alpha course</a>, the <a href="http://www.christianparty.org.uk/">Christian Party</a>[1] and the <a href="http://www.trinitarianbiblesociety.org/">Trinitarian Bible Society</a>.<br />
<br />
It's not as if there isn't a history of <a href="http://www.guardian.co.uk/commentisfree/2008/jun/20/transport.religion">religious advertising on public transport</a>.<br />
<br />
Vaguely related, I was somewhat amused by <a href="http://archbishop-cranmer.blogspot.com/">His Grace</a>'s "<a href="http://archbishop-cranmer.blogspot.com/2011/01/census-2011-mind-your-own-campaign.html">Mind your own *%$#@!! business</a>" campaign but I think I'll be ticking the No Religion box. <br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
[1] The BHA were responsible for the "<a href="http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/religion/4177717/Atheist-bus-adverts-could-lead-to-watchdog-ruling-on-Gods-existence.html">There's probably no God. Now stop worrying and enjoy your life</a>" bus adverts that generated ASA complaints. In reply the Christian Party came up with "There definitely is a God. So join the Christian Party and enjoy your life" which became the <a href="http://www.asa.org.uk/Regulation-Explained/History-of-Ad-Regulation.aspx">most complained-about non-broadcast ad ever.</a>PJHhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11331948749785269728noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4840253472679669200.post-47900267619493056802011-03-03T00:32:00.002+00:002012-02-23T18:15:52.099+00:00Update (2): Natwest - (not so) helpful bankingBack in <a href="http://advertisingbollocks.blogspot.com/2010/08/natwest-helpful-banking.html">August '10</a> I brought up Natwest's "Helpful Banking." advert.<br />
In <a href="http://advertisingbollocks.blogspot.com/2010/12/update-natwest-helpful-banking.html">December '10</a>, they got slapped down by the ASA for not opening as many branches on Saturdays as they appeared to imply in that advert.<br />
<br />
<br />
Now it appears that they aren't really living up to the rest of that advert.<br />
<br />
<a href="http://www.deloitte.com/">Deloitte</a> (an auditor) was hired by Natwest to monitor them for how well they were living up to their 'promises.'<br />
<br />
<a href="http://www.webcitation.org/5wtY9dlYS">A sample</a>[<a href="http://www.natwest.com/global/customer-charter.ashx">current</a>] of what they promised to do:<br />
<br />
<blockquote>3. We will provide you with friendly, helpful service whenever you deal with us<br />
We're aiming to get 9 out of 10 customers to rate our service as helpful.</blockquote>90% satisfaction? Wonder how they're going to select the people they're going to question.<br />
<br />
Either that or the fact that the other 10% of their customers are costing RBS/Natwest <a href="http://www.thisismoney.co.uk/savings-and-banking/article.html?in_article_id=521054&in_page_id=7">£2.8m due to mishandling of complaints</a> in the space of 6 months[1] suggests that when things go wrong, customers would be <a href="http://www.guardian.co.uk/money/2011/feb/26/santander-britains-worst-bank">better off at Santander</a>.<br />
<br />
<blockquote>9. We pledge to stay open for business if we are the last bank in town and will consider a range of options to ensure a local banking service is available<br />
We’ve already identified over 100 ‘Last in Town’ locations where we’ll continue to provide a local banking service.</blockquote>Woolly description of what "last in town" means, especially when by the industry definition, Natwest is already the "last bank in town" <a href="http://www.dailymail.co.uk/money/article-1360957/Day-reckoning-NatWest-charter.html?ito=feeds-newsxml">in 217 locations</a>. I somehow thing it's stretching the weasle phrase "over 100" to cover 217, so that means they're quite able to shut "<i>up to</i>" 116 branches and still keep this 'promise.'<br />
<br />
"Local banking service" is also similarly woolly. It's not a hard and fast commitment to actually operate a brick-and-mortar branch (Saturdays or not.) Perhaps they're going to <a href="http://www.natwest.com/personal/more-ways/g4/natwests-mobile-banking-service.ashx">buy some more white vans</a>.<br />
<br />
<blockquote>13. Twice a year we will publish the most common of complaints<br />
And we’ll strive to address the causes</blockquote><br />
It's been 7 months since the adverts. I could be wrong, but if you're going to do something twice a year, it's generally accepted that they should be 6 months apart, so that mean they should have published at least one list. <br />
<br />
Strangely I've not seen it, and it's certainly not linked on that page.<br />
<br />
<br />
<i><u><b>Anyway. How did they do?</b></u></i><br />
(I couldn't find the report/PR, so this is based on the sparse news reports currently out there.)<br />
<br />
Out of their 25 goals, they passed 20, and failed 5. That's 20% failure. (Or a "80% success rate" as Brian Hartzer, head of Retail Banking, would have you think of it.)<br />
<br />
Possibly an acceptable result had the goals been externally imposed, but these were <i><u><b>self-imposed</b></u></i>. <br />
<br />
<br />
<blockquote><b>2. We will aim to serve the majority of customers within 5 minutes in our branches</b><br />
This year we’ll introduce a new queue busting programme in our busiest branches to ensure every available member of staff is out serving customers during busy periods.</blockquote><br />
<a href="http://www.moneysavingexpert.com/news/banking/2011/03/natwest-and-rbs-fall-short-on-charter-promises">75% of customers</a> were served in under 5 minutes. Presumably leaving the other 25% waiting half and hour. Or more.<br />
<br />
<blockquote><b>3. We will provide you with friendly, helpful service whenever you deal with us</b><br />
We're aiming to get 9 out of 10 customers to rate our service as helpful.</blockquote><br />
<a href="http://www.mirror.co.uk/news/top-stories/2011/03/02/natwest-misses-key-targets-on-queues-and-complaints-115875-22959559/">Only 80% of customers believed the hype</a>. The still suspiciously high number is probably down to either judicious selection of the people questioned, or biased questioning. Again - few details available.<br />
<br />
<blockquote><b>4. We will help you to make the right choices for you and your money, providing a clear product range with simply explained features and charges</b><br />
All of our branch literature will be simplified and rewritten in line with customer feedback. We’re also introducing a new Customer Service Review programme to make it easier for our customers to choose the right product for them.</blockquote><br />
This appears to be <a href="http://www.business7.co.uk/business-news/2011/03/02/no-headline-97298-22960624/">another one</a>. Bugger all detail apart from they've reduced the number of products from 600 <i><u><b>before the banking crisis</b></u></i> to 200 now.<br />
<br />
<blockquote><b>12. We will resolve customer complaints fairly, consistently, and promptly</b><br />
We are aiming for 75% of customers to be satisfied with the way their complaint has been handled.</blockquote><a href="http://www.mirror.co.uk/news/top-stories/2011/03/02/natwest-misses-key-targets-on-queues-and-complaints-115875-22959559/">Way short. 57%.</a> And that <i><b>includes a 41% increase in complaints</b></i> about the group in the 2nd half of 2010. Perhaps RBS/Natwest were encouraging more people to complain so they could (attempt to) satisfactorily solve them to push the %age up?<br />
<br />
<br />
Sadly none of the news reports coming up on Google News at the moment have the 5th missed target. Indeed, none of them list the four I list above in much detail.<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
[1] Ok, it was the first half of 2009, but the timing of the fine coinciding with this report from Deloitte is rather embarrassing.PJHhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11331948749785269728noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4840253472679669200.post-32991251178191336982011-02-22T14:30:00.000+00:002017-07-17T11:52:21.852+01:003-in-1 - if you actually take three in one that isNescafe's "latest" wheeze for the UK[1]:<br />
<br />
<a href="http://www.nescafe.co.uk/3in1">3-in-1 coffee</a><br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://i.imgur.com/YzNf4h5.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="199" src="//i.imgur.com/YzNf4h5.png" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
<blockquote>
<span style="font-size: x-small;">With NESCAFÉ ORIGINAL 3-in-1 it’s now amazingly easy to make the perfect white coffee with sugar. <br />
All you have to do is add hot water so you get a creamy and sweet tasting coffee every time.</span></blockquote>
<br />
The premise being that the vast majority of the population all<br />
<ul>
<li>use the same sized cup</li>
<li>use the same size level-teaspoon of coffee </li>
<li>take the same amount of sugar</li>
<li>would use the same amount of whitener if they normally use skimmed/semi-skimmed/full-fat milk, but didn't have any milk</li>
</ul>
Sod all those who<br />
<ul>
<li>use pint mugs</li>
<li>use heaped teaspoons of coffee regardless of the size of their cup</li>
<li>don't take sugar</li>
<li>prefer their coffee slightly cooler due to the milk they normally add</li>
</ul>
Anyway... brief costings from a quick google search:<br />
<br />
<hr />
Asda £1.00 for <a href="http://groceries.asda.com/asda-estore/catalog/sectionpagecontainer.jsp?skuId=910000374912&referrer=cookiesDetecting">"10" servings</a> of 3-in-1: <b>10p per cup.</b><br />
<hr />
Asda £6.38 for <a href="http://groceries.asda.com/asda-estore/catalog/sectionpagecontainer.jsp?skuId=460644&departmentid=1214921923747&aisleid=1214921924181&startValue=">300g jar</a> Nescafe Original (@<a href="http://www.nestleprofessional.com/australia/en/BrandsAndProducts/Brands/NESCAFE/Pages/NESCAFE_Decaf_17g_x_280_Stick_Packs.aspx">1.7g per serving</a> => 176 servings) - 3<b>.625p per cup</b><br />
Asda £1.34 for <a href="http://groceries.asda.com/asda-estore/search/searchcontainer.jsp;jsessionid=NbDGPuMKYSMFrycxTtK8rg**.oses4082-atg09?trailSize=1&searchString=sugar&domainName=Products&headerVersion=v1&_requestid=32433">2kg of sugar</a> (lets say 2 tsp = <a href="http://nutrition.about.com/od/askyournutritionist/f/gramconversion.htm">8.4g</a> => 238 servings) - <b>0.536p per cup</b><br />
Asda £0.86 for <a href="http://groceries.asda.com/asda-estore/search/searchcontainer.jsp;jsessionid=LwtTQCssEuXRWZ2dkjbDOQ**.oses4084-atg04?trailSize=1&searchString=milk&domainName=Products&headerVersion=v1&_requestid=33100">2 pints semi-skim</a> milk (lets call it <a href="http://www.google.co.uk/search?q=1%2F4+cup+in+uk+pints">20 servings</a>) - <b>4.3p per cup</b>.<br />
<hr />
<br />
So, on the face of it, at those prices (and, of course, assumptions) you're looking at about 1.5p more expensive per cup for the, more convenient, creamy and sweet stuff (the latter comes to 8.5p rounded up.)<br />
<br />
But:<br />
<ul>
<li>You're not getting any choice in the serving size with the former</li>
<li>It assumes you actually want all three</li>
<li>You prefer whitener to milk.</li>
<li>This will, of course, be an introductory price, and it will, in no way, stay this low if they continue to sell it. </li>
</ul>
<br />
<a href="http://scaryduck.blogspot.com/">Scaryduck</a> has his <a href="http://scaryduck.blogspot.com/2011/02/nescafe-handshake.html">own take on this</a> of course...<br />
<blockquote>
However, I can't help thinking that this new innovation might be missing a trick.<br />
<br />
[...]<br />
<br />
If only you made such a product which provided the coffee lover with <b>just</b> coffee, leaving them with the option of adding sugar and milk to taste?</blockquote>
<br />
<br />
[1] They've been trying this all over the place. They <a href="http://in2eastafrica.net/nestle-hopes-nescafe-sachet-is-right-mix-for-mass-market/">tried in Africa in 2008</a>.PJHhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11331948749785269728noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4840253472679669200.post-17464306939525221902011-02-18T08:53:00.001+00:002011-02-18T10:47:23.184+00:00Polls within postsTest post to attempt to answer the question posed over at <a href="http://fuelinjectedmoose.blogspot.com/2011/02/does-anyone-know-how-to.html">The Moose</a>.<br />
<br />
Used <a href="http://dadsbattleground.blogspot.com/2008/07/how-to-add-poll-inside-of-post-on.html">http://dadsbattleground.blogspot.com/2008/07/how-to-add-poll-inside-of-post-on.html</a> as a starting point.<br />
<br />
<br />
<h2>How easy is it to create polls actually <i>in</i> blog posts?</h2><iframe allowtransparency="true" frameborder="0" height="180" name="poll-widget-4529545940302168256" src="http://www.google.com/reviews/polls/display/-4529545940302168256/blogger_template/run_app?txtclr=%23cccccc&lnkclr=%2399bbdd&chrtclr=%2399bbdd&font=normal+normal+100%25+%27Trebuchet+MS%27%2CTrebuchet%2CVerdana%2CSans-serif&hideq=true&purl=http%3A%2F%2Fadvertisingbollocks.blogspot.com%2F" style="border: medium none; width: 100%;"></iframe>PJHhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11331948749785269728noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4840253472679669200.post-47923243309208396012011-01-17T22:48:00.000+00:002017-07-17T11:53:02.839+01:00Via <a href="http://www.bitterwallet.com/things-real-people-dont-say-about-advertising/39385?utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=feed&utm_campaign=Feed%3A+bitterwallet+%28BitterWallet%29&utm_content=Google+Reader">BitterWallet</a> - a new mildly amusing blog: <a href="http://tpdsaa.tumblr.com/">Things Real People <i><b>Don't</b></i> Say About Advertising</a>:<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://tpdsaa.tumblr.com/post/2766903535/submitted-by-http-larrystuff-tumblr-com"><br />
<img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjC23XGoPW1U0tsbsMBnrYowCNDRR0RDrjkOVphDGMLCxt4nxldgLsnHzAHWMmEm7r8FyXEkx7lZYhyphenhyphenyUAQIFSEDIWH_9cjen9i8eenKFqa3TOTxgx8ul7aYFtpQ6Rk9_qE2pTjtqBPciM/s320/tumblr_lexg62LISj1qgolb1o1_500.jpg" width="238" /></a></div>
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://tpdsaa.tumblr.com/post/2724755436/submitted-by-tomheg"><br />
<img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhRGKPv4xhZuQ_nuWYpHbTqtJECqr6XLvksL1OW8jAn7-c3maFj1GxUizI9HtJiIr32Uq63PYFb7miOtNbptVcih18ghR8KqQ6P_ApYScbuGNyGPscQGk7rvGE3QVt4dnS_hi6mjggY33k/s320/54bnE.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://tpdsaa.tumblr.com/post/2748169173/submitted-by-chrismaddox"><br />
<img border="0" height="224" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiB2S_1NbGo9LMUIz_a5cfaduxUGE6NFBvamsOnJpKW7cKz9-vAb08qwIfV_baA9CNav2HWiemYKN-eBty5rCQVxpsK9TPafKOybtXtntmqq0Fhn0rEnawbI3nuoVUjtAUS38b3PRUEiPI/s320/tumblr_lf14uylA6D1qziezc.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
PJHhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11331948749785269728noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4840253472679669200.post-40457802441464730142011-01-04T14:50:00.000+00:002017-07-17T11:54:11.067+01:00BT and net neutrality.BT - claiming in one breath they're not doing something while saying they are in the next. Via the advertising medium of a newspaper quote. (Or possibly a press release - I haven't located the original source of the quote.)<br />
<br />
First, a brief definition: "Net neutrality": not forcing customers (or the websites providing the data they want to look at) to pay extra for bandwidth.<br />
<br />
For example: since the iPlayer uses up more bandwidth than, say, email, this provides a headache for ISPs since it uses up a lot of bandwidth. ISPs either provide that extra bandwidth, or manage the traffic such that other traffic gets priority over iPlayer traffic.<br />
<br />
Net neutrality (loosely - it's a bit more complicated) is the concept that while ISPs may take <i>reasonable</i> measures to manage their traffic, they shouldn't try to profit from it by, say, charging either the BBC on the one hand, or those using iPlayer on the other (or even both) to prioritise iPlayer traffic.<br />
<br />
Critics claim that opponents to net neutrality want to create a 'two tier' internet, those who are willing/forced to pay for prioritised traffic, and those who refuse/cannot afford to.<br />
<br />
BT have a new product "<a href="http://www.contentconnect.bt.com/">Content Connect</a>" (warning - annoying auto-play video.) Essentially a service whereby the likes of the BBC and Google (i.e. YouTube) can pay BT some money to have their content delivered faster to the user, or you, the end user can pay for faster, 'guaranteed' content.<br />
<br />
When called on this by the <a href="http://www.openrightsgroup.org/press/press-releases/bt-could-be-endangering-the-open-internet">Open Rights Group</a>:<br />
<blockquote>
"We are talking about ISPs competing with the Internet for content delivery. Whether films, music or gaming services, the idea is that ISPs will deliver content better and more reliably than the Internet. That says a lot about the state of investment in our Internet.<br />
<br />
"The result could be a fundamental shift away from buying services from the Internet to bundled services from ISPs: which would reduce competition and take investment away from Internet companies. That would be bad for everyone."</blockquote>
Or <a href="http://www.ft.com/cms/s/0/ff4c3fe8-1779-11e0-badd-00144feabdc0.html#axzz1A4uJCGg2">the FT</a>:<br />
<blockquote>
BT is starting to sell a new service that gives broadband providers the tools to create a two-tier internet, where some video content would reach consumers in a better condition than other material.<br />
<br />
The service devised by BT’s wholesale unit gives broadband providers the opportunity to charge content owners for high quality distribution of their video products to consumers.</blockquote>
<br />
<br />
<a href="http://www.guardian.co.uk/technology/2011/jan/04/bt-denies-paving-way-for-internet-fast-lane">BT replied</a>:<br />
<blockquote>
"Contrary to recent reports in the media, BT's Content Connect service will not create a two-tier internet, but will simply offer service providers the option of differentiating their broadband offering through enhanced content delivery," </blockquote>
<br />
Translation:<br />
<blockquote>
Content Connect will not create a two-tier internet, but will simply create a two-tier internet.</blockquote>
PJHhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11331948749785269728noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4840253472679669200.post-29998710291648921722010-12-16T12:27:00.003+00:002012-02-23T18:16:02.077+00:00Update: Natwest - helpful banking2011/03/03: <b>Update</b>: <a href="http://advertisingbollocks.blogspot.com/2011/03/update-2-natwest-not-so-helpful-banking.html">Natwest fail to pass <i><b>a fifth</b></i> of their self imposed targets</a>.<br />
<br />
<br />
Back in August I pulled <a href="http://advertisingbollocks.blogspot.com/2010/08/natwest-helpful-banking.html">Natwest's Helpful Banking advert</a> apart thusly:<br />
<br />
<blockquote><blockquote>It's why, when you told us to open on Saturdays, we did.[2]<br />
And why 160 branches will open earlier, or close later.</blockquote>[...]<br />
[2] Which banks don't have branches open on Saturdays? And I note that they don't qualify this by saying how many of their branches are open on Saturday. (I'm assuming it's not all of them since their <a href="http://www.natwest.com/tools/personal/branch_locator/step1.asp">branch locator</a> has a check box for listing only those open on Saturdays.)</blockquote>It would appear two others noticed this and put in a complaint to the <a href="http://www.asa.org.uk/ASA-action/Adjudications/2010/12/National-Westminster-Bank-plc/TF_ADJ_49512.aspx">Advertising Standards Authority</a> (I was not one of them) and Natwest got a slap on the wrist as a result:<br />
<blockquote><h3>Issue</h3>Two viewers challenged whether the claim "It's why, when you told us to open on Saturdays, we did" misleadingly implied that all NatWest branches were open on Saturdays, which they understood was not the case.<br />
<br />
<h3>Response</h3>[...] [Natwest] said they had a long history of Saturday openings and, in response to customer demand, 675 of their 1552[1] branches were currently open on Saturdays.<br />
<br />
<h3>Assessment</h3><div class="assessment-decision"><b>Upheld</b></div>The ASA noted the ad focused on the NatWest Customer Charter, but nonetheless considered that viewers would understand the claim "It's why, when you told us to open on Saturdays, we did" to mean that all NatWest branches were open on Saturdays. Because we understood that that was not the case, and there was no qualification in the ad to explain that the claim applied to selected branches only, we concluded that the ad was misleading.[...]<br />
<br />
<h3>Action</h3>The ad must not be broadcast again in its current form. </blockquote>[1] That'd be 43% then - not even 1/2 of them.PJHhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11331948749785269728noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4840253472679669200.post-67224652959452662342010-12-09T12:23:00.000+00:002017-07-17T11:56:18.165+01:00Normal people are terrorist suspectsSpotted via <a href="http://dizzythinks.net/2010/12/terrorists-or-normal-people.html">Dizzy</a>:<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://i.imgur.com/MuXWqjm.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="//i.imgur.com/MuXWqjm.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
The government wasting more money on yet another pointless advertising campaign.<br />
<br />
Examples of <a href="http://www.webcitation.org/5uqZNuc5w">suspicious behaviour</a>[<a href="http://www.met.police.uk/so/at_hotline.htm">current</a>]?<br />
<blockquote>
<ul>
<li><strong>Van</strong> - Terrorists need transport.</li>
<li><strong>Passport</strong> - Terrorists use multiple identities.</li>
<li><strong>Mobile phone</strong> - Terrorists need communication.</li>
<li><strong>Camera</strong> - Terrorists need information. </li>
<li><strong>Chemicals</strong> - Do you know someone buying large or unusual quantities of chemicals for no obvious reason?</li>
<li><strong>Mask and goggles</strong> - Terrorists use protective equipment.</li>
<li><strong>Credit card</strong> - Terrorists need funding.</li>
<li><strong>Computer</strong> - Terrorists use computers.</li>
<li><strong>Suitcase</strong> - Terrorists need to travel.</li>
<li><strong>Padlock</strong> - Terrorists need storage. </li>
</ul>
</blockquote>
I mean, really - can you come up with at least one valid and non-terrorist related use for each of those items?<br />
<br />
I could probably come up with my own list:<br />
<br />
<ul>
<li> <b>Air</b> - terrorists need to breathe. Have you seen someone breathing recently?</li>
<li><b>Water</b> - terrorists need to drink. Have you seen anyone drinking?</li>
<li><b>Food</b> - terrorists need to eat. Have you seen someone trying to buy sandwiches at Tescos?</li>
<li><b>Toilets</b> - terrorists need to piss and have a dump. Have you seen anyone visiting the pleasantly smelling lavatorial facilities in your local pub?</li>
</ul>
<br />
<br />
<a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nanny_state">Nanny-statism</a> at it's unpleasant worst.PJHhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11331948749785269728noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4840253472679669200.post-544160141281912542010-11-25T21:31:00.000+00:002017-07-17T11:57:51.616+01:00PDBTL #1 - seatbelts.First in a series of (UK) government sponsored advertising, suggesting that perhaps the <s>subjects</s> <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/British_subject">citizens</a> <a href="http://advertisingbollocks.blogspot.com/2010/11/pdbtl-and-swmfm.html">shouldn't break the law, and wasting tax-payer's money in the process.</a><br />
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This is the <a href="http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1082570/New-seatbelt-ad-gory-shown-watershed.html">"gory" version</a> of this particular advert (the <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CilbhRlUFxQ">pre 9pm watershed version</a> only omits the allegedly 'graphical' stuff that happens inside Richard's body.)<br />
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<object height="289" width="360"><param name="movie" value="//www.youtube.com/v/6kYqjTA_VEg?fs=1&hl=en_US&start=5"></param>
<param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param>
<param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param>
<embed src="//www.youtube.com/v/6kYqjTA_VEg?fs=1&hl=en_US&start=5" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="360" height="289"></embed></object><br />
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<blockquote>
Richard didn't want to die, [Richard is driving along] but he couldn't stop himself.[1]<br />
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The collision [two cars head-on-collide[2] in a residential area[3]] with the car didn't kill him, but he wasn't wearing a seatbelt, so he continued on his journey. [Airbag deploys and Richard hits it full on.][4]<br />
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When he hit the inside of the car[5] [his head breaks the windscreen[4]], that didn't kill him either. <br />
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But his internal organs carried on travelling until they hit his ribcage[5] [graphic of Richard's ribs], and his lungs were punctured [his ribs break and enter lungs[6]], and the main artery from his heart was torn.[shift to front view, and slowly leaking blood from his 'heart' is shown[7]]<br />
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And that's what killed Richard.<br />
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[Fade]<br />
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[Think! Always wear a seatbelt]</blockquote>
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[1] Perhaps Richard should have had his brakes checked last time they felt spongy then. Or perhaps he should have been paying attention to the road ahead of him. Or perhaps he shouldn't have been speeding.[8]<br />
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[2] Such a perfect head on collision. To pick an <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Epidemiology_of_motor_vehicle_collisions&oldid=393934440">easily found link</a> at random, in 2005 in the US, only 2% of collisions were head on, (though were the cause of 10% of fatal crashes.) Most other 'head on collisions' don't involve the car going straight ahead as shown and stopping in such a short distance - <a href="http://www.last-word.com/content_handling/show_tree/tree_id/2664.html">which is what causes the injuries stated</a>. If there isn't an air-bag[4]<br />
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[3] Typical speed limit in a residential area in the UK? (<a href="http://www.direct.gov.uk/en/TravelAndTransport/Highwaycode/DG_070304">Section 24</a>) 30mph. Are we expected to believe that there is a substantial number of fatal, perfect, head on collisions at 30mph in built up areas where at least one of the drivers dies?<br />
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[4] Hang on... Air bag? Those are supposed to protect you are they not? :<br />
<a href="http://www.americaspodiatrist.com/2009/07/the-one-airbag-your-car-still-needs/"><img src="//i.imgur.com/OAzU24E.jpg" width="300" /></a><br />
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WTF is his head doing hitting the windscreen with such force (at 30mph[3]) that it breaks? That is one seriously mis-designed air-bag. Maybe it's the car company that killed him?<br />
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[5] The only part of Richard shown hitting the car at any speed is his head. The rest of his torso should have been less affected due to the air-bag[4]<br />
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[6] Not necessarily fatal.<br />
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[7] Given the speed of the blood coming out of that heart, the pathologist in me suspects that Richard was long dead before the crash, and *that's* what caused the crash.<br />
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[8] I have no doubt that one of those adverts will make an appearance here.<br />
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Anyway - as pointed out in a <a href="http://advertisingbollocks.blogspot.com/2010/11/pdbtl-and-swmfm.html">previous post</a>, the fact the advert exists is a load of bollocks. While being in a moving car without wearing a seat-belt (with certain exceptions) is against the law, punishable by a fine, the government's own statistics show that the <a href="http://www.last-word.com/content_handling/show_tree/tree_id/2664.html">adverts do fuck all</a>:<br />
<blockquote>
This publication presents estimates of seatbelt wearing rates [...] by drivers in England. Estimates of seatbelt wearing rates for Scotland are also included. Surveys were carried out in October and November 2009.<br />
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The main results from the seatbelt survey for England are:<br />
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* The proportion of car drivers observed wearing seat belts <b>has not changed since the 2008 survey</b>, remaining at 95 per cent in 2009. </blockquote>
PJHhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11331948749785269728noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4840253472679669200.post-78208326753861774612010-11-25T19:52:00.002+00:002017-07-17T12:00:26.546+01:00We know you opted out but...... we really <i>really</i> want to send you some crap.<br />
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<blockquote>
SO MUCH TO SAY.[1]<br />
<br />
DON'T MISS OUT ON ALL THE LATEST MARKET INFORMATION AND INSIGHTS.[2]<br />
<br />
Dear XXXXXXXX<br />
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We like to keep our customers up—to—date with all that’s going on, whenever we can. However, because you’ve chosen not to receive marketing communications[3] we’re not able to keep you informed of the latest news, offers, and insights.[4]<br />
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We’re committed to maintaining the privacy of all our customers.[5] That’s why if you do decide to opt back in, we’ll keep your information safe and secure. We won't share any of your details with third parties for marketing purposes.[6]<br />
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THE BENEFITS OF KEEPING UP-TO-DATE.<br />
<br />
From fund launches and investor information to latest offers such as the cash back offers. It could benefit you and your investments to stay in touch with all the things we’d love to tell you about.[7]<br />
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We’ll only ask you this once every three years.[8] lf you do change your mind later on, you can opt out simply by calling or writing to us.<br />
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DON'T MISS OUT ON WHAT WE'VE GOT TO SAY.<br />
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Opting back in to our communications is quick and easy. Just fill in the reply form below and send it back to us free of charge in the enclosed reply—paid envelope.<br />
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We look forward to hearing from you soon.[9]<br />
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Yours sincerely,</blockquote>
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[1] Too bloody much it appears.<br />
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[2] I somehow think that L&G are hardly on the cutting edge (well any more than, say, LLTSB who took over Clerical Medical recently.)<br />
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[3] There was a reason for that. I get enough crap through my letter box. And I thought a check box indicating "don't send me stuff not directly relevant to any accounts I hold with you" meant, well, not sending me stuff that's not directly relevant to any accounts I hold with L&G.<br />
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[4] Or advertising asking me to opt back in. Oh... wait... that's not right is it?<br />
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[5] No you're not. It's a <a href="http://www.legislation.gov.uk/ukpga/1998/29/section/11">legal</a> <a href="http://www.legislation.gov.uk/ukpga/1998/29/section/10">requirement</a> of the Data Protection Act. Not maintaining my privacy might <a href="http://www.legislation.gov.uk/ukpga/1998/29/section/13">cost you money</a>, and certainly loss of good will.<br />
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[6] Of course, that's no guarantee that you won't offer the opportunity to send me crap on behalf of 3rd parties yourselves, is it? And make money from those 3rd parties doing it.<br />
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[7] Or I could just read the financial press, (and there's quite a bit of it online.)<br />
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[8] Once every three years too often in my opinion. And I'm sure there's absolutely no way of opting out of these three yearly reminders, without ceasing to be your customer. Or even if I ceased to be your customer.<br />
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[9] Don't hold your breath.PJHhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11331948749785269728noreply@blogger.com0